This may be one of my favorite posts written thus far as it pertains to many if not all first-time-moms. Mommy brain and losing yourself.
What is mommy brain? When does it start? What causes it? Is it a real thing?
This past weekend my friend and I went to the spa to unwind while the kiddos stayed home with their dads (yes, yay!)
We got to talking about how our lives have changed since baby and how post pregnancy is different from your pre-pregnancy days. Wait what? You mean I am not the same person after childbirth? No, mama! You’re aren’t. Your mental state is not the same and does not automatically return to its former self for a while.
Research concludes that the mommy brain can be attributed to an upheaval of hormones. The new responsibilities that comes with being a mother are endless. Because there is a huge learning curve of taking care of a newborn, you are gathering a lot of new information and worried about keeping your baby well-fed. This consumes your brain. Thoughts like: How many wet diapers does she have? Is she breathing? How can I tell if she is hungry? She has a diaper rash, what caused it? When do I sleep train and what method do I use? Should baby sleep on her back or tummy? You get the point. Amid the chaos, you tend to lose yourself. Any mom with experience would agree. So how can you find yourself again? The below are some tips that have helped me gradually get back to my pre-motherhood mental state of mind.
- Asking for help: this is number one because you can’t do it alone. NO matter how much you think you can. If you are able, you can hire mother’s helper or have a friend willing to help occasionally. They can get you grocery or cook for you. They can spend 2 hours with your child while you relax.
- Find a hobby: there were some things you used to enjoy doing before you became a mother. Try and see if the excitement will return if you resume the activity. Examples, practicing yoga or crafting.
- Embrace your new life and make it better: Explore and learn new things. Afterall life with a new baby is a new season so spice it up by taking advantage of the new experiences you are learning along the way.
- Take care of yourself: this is the BIGGEST one for me. Think about it this way. Can you take care of your baby if you are not your best? Nope. It’s that simple.
- Connect with new moms: find a circle of moms going through a similar journey as you and find times to meet up and do something fun together. It makes a whole lot of difference when you are able to open up with someone who actually understands what you mean and can empathize.